I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
