So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
