just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
