I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
