Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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