why didn't you poke me back
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
