So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Randomize
