Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
