Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
