i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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