I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
