it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
