Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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