careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
