I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
