somebody snuck up and got me drunk
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
