So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
