please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize