another moral hangover. fuck.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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