So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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