They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
