There was a lot of him and a little penis
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
