She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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