i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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