That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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