So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
