why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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