yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize