Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
