The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
