I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Quick, to the slutcave!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Is Oprah even human
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
