This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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