I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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