I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
