I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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