are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
