pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
