OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Randomize
