just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
