Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Do you have feelings for this penis?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
