Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
