you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize