haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
