Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize