I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Even the bartender felt bad for me
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
