no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
