The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
