you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
