he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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