i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
